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Sexuality

A perspective on diversity.

The intention of this blog is to provoke consideration and stimulate discussion that can be developed in our Chat Room or Facebook Group. This is the first of a pair of articles, one on how people view sexuality and the other on issues of gender identity. They are maybe a little more "serious" than will be the usual style here.


People are not straight/bi/gay. We have a single sexual drive with diverse expressions.

Controversial? Any opinion on how people come to be who they are always is.

The language people use about sexual preference suggests that most believe we have polarised erotic drives, an attraction toward our own gender and an obverse and more common desire for the opposite sex. They talk as if these two conflicting impulses pull us one way or the other until we find ourselves, maybe just for the moment, at a point on a spectrum. They use terms which at least group, if not separate individual predilections; "are you gay or straight or bi?".

There is a simpler (and on that ground alone, preferred) perspective, that the procreational imperative and the delight of orgasm give us a simple and singular sexual drive which is directed by upbringing, peer pressure, experience and opportunity. We do not "have a sexuality"; we are "sexual".

The continuation of our species depends on generation and so heterosexual intercourse is essential to survival. Some take that truth as grounds for insisting it is the only permissible outlet for our sexual drive, a dogma which some religions and ethical philosophies promote to the point of violence. Although not in itself an apolgia for erotic diversity, the over-population of the planet and the excessive demands on its finite resources suggest the advantages of different perspectives. Unless abstinent, we need alternatives to making more children. Now, please don't take that as an intention to promote any particular erotic choice - the options for satisfaction are almost infinite and not confined to any sexual preference.

Is sexual preference a choice? Only in part. The extent to which our decisions are constrained by our circumstances is a matter for debate. Maybe we have more control over whether our sensual behaviour is kind and considerate than where it is focused. We certainly have a great deal of control over whether we respect how others view themselves.

So there is one point of view; why not share yours in our Facebook Group? Please remember, though, that the group admins are very keen to maintain a polite, friendly and constructive environment and will not hesitate to remove aggressive or offensive comments. Full (contributing) membership of the group is subject to approval and while we do not "vet" applications that does allow us to remove permanently anyone whose posts are inappropriate.

These views are based not on peer-reviewed academic study but on more than fifty years of intimate observation of what is now called the LGBT+ community by someone trained and experienced more in social work than medical psychology.

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